Huffington Post – 9 Things Marriage Therapists Know Almost Instantly About A Couple

Curious what a marriage therapist might glean about your relationship in an instant? Turns out there are many things marriage therapists know about us right off the bat. We all say so much about ourselves in our words and actions often without even knowing it, and if we know how to listen, we can learn a lot.  Whether it’s in couples therapy or simply at home on your couch, knowing more about yourself and your relationship can be an important element in staying as healthy as possible.

Huffington Post asked me about a few obvious and not-so-obvious things I can understand fairly quickly in therapy, and I was pleased to round out this informative list. To read the full post, click HERE.

9. They know if one partner is already out the door.

“Any indication of leaving the marriage can be significant and a difficult hurdle in therapy. Sometimes the couple has consulted a divorce attorney or one partner simply made a statement about moving on with their lives. It’s not so much that they’ve considered the legal process of dissolving a marriage ― it’s that they’ve envisioned a future without their partner. It’s the mindset. Instead of focusing on protecting and saving their marriage, a spouse begins to focus on protecting themselves and their language starts to become more individually oriented. Couples therapy can’t be successful without both partners buying into the relationship for at least for the foreseeable future.” ― Alicia H. Clark, a psychologist based in Washington, D.C.