Surviving Fidelity: 4 Secrets to Keep Love Alive – YourTango

Screen Shot 2014-04-04 at 11.04.07 PMIn thinking about fidelity and how to keep a monogamous relationship strong and satisfying, a few key points emerged in participating in the video panel Is Monogamy Natural with YourTango experts and in my continuing work with couples. Surviving fidelity and keeping love alive is something almost every couple struggles with at one point or another. Here is a post I wrote for YourTango on how to protect your relationship and keep intimacy alive, highlighting the importance of novelty, emotional risk-taking, flirtation, and effective communication.

Surviving Fidelity: 4 Secrets to Keep Love Alive

People often equate monogamy with monotony: The longer a relationship continues, the more likely boredom sets in. As a consequence, sex often becomes routine, or gets placed as low priority. Just going to sleep after a long day can replace what used to be a time for romance.

A major problem with ignoring our partner, or not making the relationship a priority, is that it can lead to an affair. The lure of something different, something seemingly more appealing, interesting, or stimulating is appealing.  An affair can provide an on-the-side honeymoon, the emotional and physical excitement that is missing in the current relationship. The key is that these longings are usually misplaced.  What we really want is a better relationship with our partner.

To read the full post:

Posted in ,

Alicia H. Clark, PsyD