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Huffington Post – 10 Big, Divorce-Proofing Talks To Have Before Getting Married

There are so many talks to have before getting married, and I was pleased to help with this terrific Huff Po roundup that covers the biggies. But possibly the most important quality to assess before you commit to someone is how you communicate.
If you want to see how you might handle conflict in your future marriage, go ahead and disagree. Argue, fight about something, anything, that’s really important to you and see what happens. How do you disagree, and how do you make up?
Communication skills might be the most valuable tool you and your partner can bring to a healthy marriage. And not just when it’s easy, but when it’s hard. Working through conflict is vital to any healthy relationship. Knowing you and your partner can handle it gives you both the confidence you need to face whatever challenges may lie ahead.

In fact, the ability to broach big, difficult conversations early on is one of the most important qualities in a new relationship, said Alicia HClark, a psychologist in Washington, D.C.,

“You can’t know how you work through disagreements until you have them,” she told HuffPost. “Disagreeing, arguing and fighting about these things will reveal what’s really important to you both. And knowing how your partner will handle conflict is almost just as important.”

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Alicia H. Clark, PsyD

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