It is easy for couples to lose track of healthy communication. On a fundamental level, human beings need to feel understood. This is the foundation upon which almost all relationships – be they personal or professional – must be built. Achieving healthy communication can be as easy as throwing and catching a ball. These three steps involve taking turns initiating careful communication and actively listening, methods shown in studies to maximize feeling understood.
Our emotions are like rubber balls bouncing around inside us. They cause us continual inner turmoil that continues to escalate as the balls continue to bounce back and forth. Similarly, it is difficult to feel settled when we do not feel understood. When we articulate how we are feeling, it is like throwing a ball to our listener. If we feel that our listener has understood us, it is as though he has “caught” the ball and it is no longer bouncing back and forth. It is in our best interests to help our listener catch the ball (understand how we are feeling), which will provide us with a sense of relief.
[bra_blockquote align=”]this simple model involves taking turns speaking and actively listening[/bra_blockquote]